Sunday, June 22, 2008

Drink Up...

At the risk of this blog sounding very hyper-conservative (which I am not) and extremely self-righteous (which I promise I am also not) I am going to write a blog tonight about something that I am SO not a fan of and which is bothering me to no end at the moment. Now as you read this I know you might think that my hatred is due to my conservative upbringing, which is understandable. However, it honestly has nothing to do with that and has all to do with my personal experiences with it. The thing of which I speak is alcohol. I hate it. Almost more than anything else. It is probably in my top three things I hate, definitely in my top ten. Lemme explain why I am feeling this way.

Now lemme first preface this with a couple things. First off, I don't drink. It is definitely not my thing. If you have read any of my other blogs you will know that one of my main focuses in life it to try to be more concious and alcohol is the last thing I need in that fight. Personally, I don't like anything that makes me feel that I am not in control of my thoughts or actions. Secondly, this is totally not a knock on any of my close friends who drink (which is basically 98% of them). It's cool, I don't hold it against you and I love you to death and back.

So lets talk about it. Seeing that I don't drink, it is a huge hinder on my social life sometimes. I cannot think of anything less fun than being the only sober person at a party. Sitting there, trying to have an intelligent or even remotely meaningful conversation with a drunk person is futile. They have the attention span of a six year old whose mom forgot to pack his Aderol in his lunch box. Trying to get them to do anything or go somewhere is even worse, like herding cats. I guess I am just frustrated because it seems like recently, the entire focus of many of my friend's lives revolves around drinking. I don't see why we can't enjoy each other without alcohol as a filter. Why is an event considered boring if there isn't booze involved. My thoughts are, why go anywhere fun and drink because you won't enjoy or even remember the experience anyway?

One example is a party I went to recently. It was a going away party of sorts. People were trashed before I even got there. When I arrived I had fun but after a while it got stale. As I sat there and looked around I felt so lonely, like I was the only sane person in the room. I felt so isolated from everyone else because it felt like I was the only person who felt like this about drinking. Everyone else loves it and has a great time stumbling around, embarrassing themselves, then throwing up on the rug in the bathroom (then hiding it because they aren't in a state to clean it up). The other disheartening thing was that as this person was saying goodbye to all the people who came to wish him well, I knew that the next day, he wouldn't even remember the conversation or that that person was even there. Why consciously delete precious memories?

I feel that so many enlightening moments in life come from the most unlikely sources and if you aren't ready to receive them, or if you aren't in a state that you are capable to, that they will be lost to you forever. I just thought of a quote by Martha Graham. It says:

"There is a vitality, a life-force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and be lost."

I guess I am just sad that anything of depth and passion is being lost to something as vapid as a beverage.


Allie said...

Wise words.

Dare I say it?.. Words of Wisdom.

haha Okay, that is all!

Curtis said...

I liked this one. I like all of them. Just came to your blog for the first time. And now I am thinking you are not the person I once thought you were. Which is a good thing. Don't worry. ;)

As for the drinking... I know exactly how you feel about being the only sober one. Before I started drinking, I was always that guy. I drink a little now. Not NEARLY as much as I did last year. Looking back, I dont necessarily regret any of it, BUT I do wish I would have had more MEANINGFUL memories and events with my friends. We had some good times. REALLY good times. But I wonder if we could have replaced a few of those drunken nights with something a little more lasting.

With that said, I still drink on occasion. Not really to get drunk like I used to. But, you know me. I am SUPER quiet. Alcohol loosens me up A LOT. Its a HORRIBLE excuse. I know. And i am getting away from the habit. But I still enjoy a night of drinks on occasion. Just so the quiet Curtis opens his damn self up! lol.

Anywho.. I like the blog. i will keep reading. :)